Comment on What's the deal with breakfast in bed?
givesomefucks@lemmy.world 1 day ago
It’s about someone putting all the effort in so it’s ready for you.
I wouldn’t give a shit either and don’t see the appeal, but it’s human variation. Like, you probably don’t really see the appeal of going out to eat with friends, and would rather do some other activity with them that you do enjoy.
But for the majority of people, food is currency, and eating in front of people shows that you’re not going to just take all the food for yourself and you’re willing to provide for someone who (in the moment) has none.
You’re not going to really get a logical answer, it’s just leftover instincts from billions of years of evolution. Like how your dog isn’t freaking out in excitement over a treat, they’re happy because you are choosing to give them “your” food. Even if it’s the smallest piece they inhale without tasting. It was yours and you gave it to them. It re-enforces the bond.
The intent is what matters. You value who you share your food with, so who you share food with feels valued by you.
scripty@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
I totally get all of that. Wouldn’t all of that hold true if you were having breakfast on a table/kitchen island too though? I’m specifically confused about what makes having it in bed special.
givesomefucks@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Because it’s there for you as soon as you wake up.
The other person (assumedly) got up early, obtained food, and prepared it just for you, without you signalling that you wanted it. Something that in modern times isn’t that big of a deal because it’s just in the kitchen.
But it shows they thought of you and your needs on their own. They thought of you when you were unconscious and took steps to ensure your comfort and survival. It’s such a base thing that it still really matters.
Like I said, it’s not really a logical thing that it should matter so much, because food is a lot more accessible. It’s an evolutionary holdover from long before humans or even primates existed. And due to natural variation some people just won’t see any point in it, where to other people it’s still a huge sign of love.
Like, if you asked why facial symmetry is attractive, most people couldnt explain it. But they still enjoy looking at a symmetrical face even if they don’t know why. And humans are really bad at just guessing and then rationalizing. So they’ll come up with some bullshit and honestly believe it.
So logically table or bed doesn’t matter. But brains aren’t logical. That boost of it being there the instant you get woken up is what matters most. It’s a sign that even when you’re not physically present the other person will care about you.
shalafi@lemmy.world 1 day ago
From the perspective of a traditional woman’s role, it’s a luxury offered by a caring husband or child. Women traditionally got out of bed and started breakfast for the rest of the family. Breakfast in bed is a reversal of that role.
“It’s OK mom/honey. You don’t have to get up today. Stay in bed and enjoy yourself.”
I think it’s more of trope than a thing people do now days.