Fuck that noise, I can’t stand that petty nonsense. If someone’s gonna be snarky to me over something dumb, I like to loud-cap and embarass them. Ya don’t even have to be mean, just direct and blunt

When I’m asked to hold someone’s purse, I don’t hold it in my hand away from me like it’s diseased. I put it on my shoulder like god intended. If someone wants to say something instead of minding their business… I’m going to have a little fun. “THEY’RE TRYING TO STEAL MY PURSE!!! THAT’S NOT YOUR PURSE SIR!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU‽”