Comment on What kind of upbringing makes an incel?
WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 year agoThe important part of the word incel is the “in”—their situation is involuntary. They don’t have the skills or ability to change without help.
Comment on What kind of upbringing makes an incel?
WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 year agoThe important part of the word incel is the “in”—their situation is involuntary. They don’t have the skills or ability to change without help.
Rhoeri@lemmy.world 1 year ago
Most do- they just think they’re entitled enough not to have to life a finger. It’s entirely voluntary for most of them.
WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 year ago
I have a friend who has slid into a lifestyle that is incel adjacent (he’s not quite fully rage filled against women yet), and I find that it is hard to determine what is voluntary and what isn’t. He is fully capable of getting a job or a girlfriend, but his worldview is so warped by depression and anxiety that he simply self sabotages any opportunity to have those things. He suffers greatly and blames himself a lot, but he is also the only thing that is ever standing in his way.
He doesn’t lift a finger to work unless forced, but observing him over the years has led me to believe that it is all a product of severe anxiety. There is no chance of failure if you never try, and it’s easier to act arrogant than it is to constantly reveal how much you actually hate and doubt yourself.
Sadly, there’s not much you can do for someone like that other than continue to be honest and hope it seeps in. Sometimes I feel like Brandon Novak waiting on Bam Margera to be ready for help, but I still have hope that he’ll see the light one day. Under all that negativity, he is still a worthwhile person.
SwallowsDick@lemmy.world 1 year ago
You left a comment above saying that there are no cultural elements that contribute to people becoming incels. You need to have some more empathy for people, as long as they aren’t hurting others
Rhoeri@lemmy.world 1 year ago
I have zero empathy for people with self-inflicted conditions.