Comment on I.... what?
tweeks@feddit.nl 6 days agoAfter 25 years of suicidal thoughts I’ve finally taken antidepressants, Zoloft was what worked for me.
In a couple of months the black thoughts became more rare and now in a year or so they are almost gone. I don’t feel the active need to kill myself any longer. Which feels… a bit uncanny almost. Not all in life is good, but this specific lack of despair is nice; still really bizarre to not have this endless dread any longer. I try to enjoy that while it lasts.
I did a lot of meditation as well with Headspace, can recommend that too.
Hope you find your way.
Psythik@lemm.ee 6 days ago
I’m glad that you found a medication works for you. Happy to hear that the dark thoughts are gone. I’ve been searching for over 20 years to no avail.
I’m not going to kill myself but I am tired, oh so tired. I just want to be able to wake up one day and feel like everything is okay, without immediately turning to substances the moment I wake up on a work day.
Tried sobriety for a month, and lost my job because of it. Without weed and Kratom I literally cannot function in the workplace. Some minor inconvenience happens; I lose my shit and quit. But when I’m buzzing everything is just fine. Not great, but good enough to get through the day. It’s pathetic. I just want to be able to feel good like my coworkers do naturally. I want to socialize and make friends instead of isolating myself all the time, even with drugs.
I’ll look into “Headspace”; thanks. (Is it an app?)