I can lift a fully-grown horse above my head, and I can hold my breath for ten minutes.

To settle a wager, I once ate a pound of P.B. Fouke’s strongest badger poison and then ran a mile in the nude. I cannot feel pain, and I can see for two miles unaided by a lens. No man can kill me. I have beaten a man of every race in formal combat, including a Turk, a Pygmy Negro Man and a rare Deepwater Jew.

A medical doctor and two priests have written and signed a document confirming that I have no soul.