Comment on gigadee
SitD@lemy.lol 5 weeks agoin a framework where people are just alive to mate this is a valid theory, but women can also self-express in more ways than offering sex 😂 also, people who only act on their instincts are even more dead than the ones that never act on their instincts. whenever your mode of operation is exactly and only one, never changing, that’s not a good thing.
anyways, i agree with the core here, which is that vast amounts of the population heavily communicates what criterions others have to fulfill to be desirable. I’d much rather prefer everyone does what they want and chill out
HalfSalesman@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
No, its a valid theory even if women self-express in ways other than sexuality and the post you were responding to wasn’t suggesting “only acting on instincts” in the first place. But that our society of repressing sexuality is making most of us miserable. There is only a select few people who seem to actually benefit from this set up, and that’s people who either don’t actually desire sexuality for direct enjoyment at all or value it and how it interacts with them more for obtaining other things other than sexual things in life.
AN important thing to note, people expressing themselves in ways outside of sexuality can make them sexier. And being sexier can enhance non-sexual aspects of a person.
I think the issue people have is they think wanting sexuality from a person means you are objectifying them by reducing them to sexuality, when in reality its that the sexuality is enhanced by them specifically not being an object. There are many reasons sex with a person and not with a dildo or fleshlight is considered a lot more pleasurable but one of them is that people aren’t objects.
Also almost no one only operates in one “mode of operation” anyway. This isn’t a real problem except in the minds of prudes. The apparent “obsession” with sex for some people is temporal, some people desire sex up front and then want to do other things once satisfied. Some people want to do other things and then find themselves in the mood after some time with the alternate activity. Its not complicated.