Comment on How rare is it for people to live without anger?
Tarquinn2049@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
I’m Autustic and don’t seem to have anger. “Frustrated” is similar, I got that one just fine, but anger doesn’t seem to come up. I don’t seem to have a bunch of them, though. So, I have definitely noticed the same thing. The internet is so full of anger, and it mostly just seems to serve to temporarily compromise the intellect of the person feeling it, so it makes them sound dumber at a time when they probably wish they were coming across as clever.
Dumber, but also more sure of themselves. There is a reason people usually come back half an hour later and apologize for what they did when they were angry. It does have its uses, but open communication can also preclude it. For people who don’t tend to communicate freely, anger can help them finally say something they haven’t been saying. And quite a few people seem to work that way. Finally saying the thing they haven’t been saying can lead to solutions for their problem.
But anger can also lead to some pretty dumb things, and that seems to be the more common result.
idiomaddict@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
I’m also autistic and also don’t really feel anger. I feel disappointed and/or frustrated with how people act, and I can feel a complete lack of goodwill towards people (not my baseline, I generally want to help people if I can). There are certainly people who deserve negative consequences for their actions and I don’t feel any compassion for Assad, for example. I probably wouldn’t piss on him if he were on fire, but I don’t feel angry with him (I might if I were Syrian and/or had more experience with the effects of his actions).
In my personal life, I don’t have any exes that I’m angry with (and I have some awful exes), it’s either confused, afraid of, pitying, neutral or positive.
Though tbh, I’m not sure if I just don’t recognize anger but do feel it. A coworker was sketchy about a tip we should have shared the other day, and I felt that it was wrong she pretended she hadn’t gotten a tip, and sad for her that she’d be deceptive about €0,65, but I wasn’t angry.
I do feel spiteful sometimes, which has got to be similar, but the only way I really express that is being extra polite to someone who’s being a dick so they feel guilty. It feels to me like I do that because I want them to be less rude in the future and I want to help induce the natural consequence of guilt that comes along with rudeness, but that could also just be my rationalizing it.