Stop focusing on looks. Become someone who: likes themselves, is funny, is caring, is growing their career, is good fixing things, is strong, is a leader, helps others, can sing well, or something else.
Unexpectedly, showing progress is nearly as important than the end state. Someone growing their career and becoming funny, gets most of the points for having a good career and being funny (note actual progress, not day dreaming).
My advice is to pursue whatever you guess will help you like yourself, but that is not necessary.
dingus@lemmy.world 1 week ago
I think you all are misunderstanding my question. I tried to phrase it in a general way so that it could potentially apply to other people. But you all are misinterpreting what I am saying.
I am absolutely not saying that I’m ugly. I am somewhat average looking to maybe slightly below average looking. I don’t generally like to admit any of the following out loud because I don’t like to brag. But I am fit, nice, funny, well liked, and have a very good job making good money.
There are plenty of people that look “regular” like me. “Regular” people seem to be attracted to me. I am only attracted to ultra attractive people. Ultra attractive people are not the norm and are an outlier. It doesn’t matter how much “personality” someone has for me. It doesn’t make me attracted to them. I have been on dates with sweet, caring, funny, normal people like me. I don’t have the capacity for attraction to them. I understand that it makes me “shallow”, but I cannot choose this attraction. Many times I wish I had the capacity to feel attraction to those around me, but I cannot.
MNByChoice@midwest.social 1 week ago
I am afraid you are misunderstanding me.
There is no way to control who you are attracted to. You control do fully control what you act on.
You could avoid looking at “supermodels”. Maybe that will help.
If you want to date supermodels, then improve yourself enough they want to date you. If that is not possible, then consider getting professional psychiatric help for this “supermodel” thing.
Regular people should improve themselves. That is all they can do.