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Comments

• Chickenstalker@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I need to poop. Bye.

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• GrindingGears@lemmy.ca ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Start small, everything good in life happens by first taking baby steps. I’m an introvert too, and I’m a senior manager, so I can’t just ignore everyone, as a really big part of my job is managing people. I have the very same feelings you do, a lot of the time I feel like I’m wasting time, I’m super busy and my time is very valuable. But in the very same way, so is theirs. Flip the script a bit, like they are coming to you and talking to you about something they feel is very valuable for you to know about. They are considering you a valuable part of their day, so pay that back in some way. Doesn’t mean you need to drone on all day with someone if you aren’t interested. But do give them a couple minutes of your time, it won’t make or break your day if it’s bite sized.

  Then after a polite couple of minutes, just stretch your arms, let out a big sigh and just say, "whelp guess I better get back to it, I gotta get this done this morn/aft, roll your eyes, let out an awkward chuckle, and there you go. Just find a polite way to break the conversation. Even tell little white lies if you have to, for example, “whelp, I have to get this TPS report down to Julie, she’s been waiting for me.” Things like that can work too.

  Also it helps to just show people little bite sized acts of kindness, as you inevitably make your way around the office. Oh! I like your necklace or hey how was your weekend? How goes the battle? Like little prompts to show kindness, but not necessarily ones that will get you sucked into long convos. These are usually met with a shrug of the shoulders, or a great how was yours, and you can just say yeah it was great, not long enough laughs. And there you go, on with your day, and everyone will think to themselves, that 6H, they are an OK person.

  Just understand and be comfortable with it being hard. It’s hard for me too sometimes, like it’s not as natural as it is for other people. I just have to make sure I give it a bit of conscious effort, and it easily goes a long way as long as there is genuine effort. Remember that no one actually wants to be there, like they all feel the same generally uncomfortable way you do, they just express it in a different way. Work is a means to an end for everyone else too. People need connection to find meaning, and we do too, we just struggle internally with what that exactly means, and the value of it a bit more.

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• slowwooderrunsdeep@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  If you really don’t like taking to people that much, try for remote work. Once I almost went a full week without hearing another coworkers voice.(I’m not counting Teams chats bc I actually have work discussions there and I can ignore them as needed.)

  If that’s not possible, learn to lean into extroversion a little. If someone wants to chat, let them talk a bit. You could let them talk about themselves the whole time, extroverts love that shit.

  Give it ten minutes and then tell them you’re on a deadline or something and need to get back to work. If you really can’t handle it at the moment, do that second part immediately when they start talking.

  The key is to be polite and respectful, but still assertive. It takes practice to get that mix right, so try it with some friends if you’re not sure how it comes across.

  And just throwing it out there - I know you said you’re not looking to make friends, but this is what 80% of “networking” really is; just making friends enough that they’ll be a good reference.

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