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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/imhereforthefreemeal on 2023-10-06 19:25:49.
We are a couple in our early to mid 30’s expecting our first child (not necessarily relevant except alot of our friends are also in this point of their life including the couple being referenced). We, like most of our friends are pretty settled in our lives, have decent paying jobs and are for all intents and purposes home owning adults now.
One couple in our friends group will invite you over to their home for dinner and will always without fail send you over a venmo request to split any food whether ordered or prepared. The last instance the other night we all just shared two pizzas and within 10 minutes after leaving their home got the request for money.
This doesn’t necessarily keep us up at night and we don’t really have a hard time finding the money to split the bill but me and my wife feel it’s a big difference when specifically being invited over to someone’s home for dinner vs say going out to eat and splitting the tab at a restaurant. So are we the AH’s for expecting when being invited to someone’s home for a meal that you are typically treated to that meal free of charge?
As a side note we and many of our other friends / couples within the same group never charge each other if we invite people over for food / drinks unless the gathering is large with multiple groups of people or is implicitly known ahead we’re looking to split the cost. We’re used to this at this point and have learned to expect it from this couple but has gotten old and from now on just plan to just stop going over for dinners and will either eat ahead on our own or find other things to do with them.
intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 year ago
Communicate with your friends.
Communicate.
Don’t slowly, silently alter your relationship to avoid the communication. Speak. Converse. Communicate.