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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwRA-on-to on 2023-08-07 09:40:30.


My 17-year-old son and his girlfriend had a baby over the spring and unfortunately lost it due to a congenital defect. The funeral was a couple of days ago and while my son has been very stoic about the whole thing and focused on taking care of his girlfriend and making sure she has a solid rock to lean on, so to speak, I can tell it’s taken a toll on him. When we got home after the funeral he went to the fridge and just started drinking a beer.

Now I know he’s 17 and technically he shouldn’t be drinking but I didn’t feel like I had the right to lecture him right then. He had a few drinks and then he sat next to me and I just put my arm around him and hugged him. My husband didn’t say anything at the time but afterwards expressed his concern that I’d let him use drinking as a coping mechanism at such a serious time, and by doing so I was opening a door to potential addiction.

He said what I did was irresponsible and that the only reason he didn’t say anything is because it was right after the funeral and he didn’t want to make a scene. At first I didn’t back down because honestly I don’t think I did anything wrong; having a few drinks as a teenager does not an alcoholic make. But I’ve been thinking about it and I’m considering maybe I was in the wrong, and owe my husband (who is still somewhat upset about it) an apology. AITA?