Sorry about what you’re going through.

You miss your parents because they gave you love of some kind, whether or not it was the right kind, all your life. The same reason people don’t leave their abusive partners.

As for school, if you’re in the US just take your GED, if you feel up for it. You may be done with high school earlier than you would’ve otherwise! It will save you a year of social obnoxiousness while you’re going through something difficult. And if your goal is college, just be sure to weave in your story in your application essays and you’re a shoe-in. Idk, college boards eat stories like this up, so hey, silver lining!

What your parents did, as per your description, is wrong. I think most people can agree with this. You’re right to be confused. Sorry youre going through this. Just know your confusion is valid, your pain is valid. You’re right to be upset with the way they treated you and you’re right to stand your ground on being with the people who you love.