My comment has nothing to do with the damages caused by addicts to those around them. You’re right, it’s jot black and white, and that’s one of the major issues about addiction vs the people who can’t/wont understand it from the outside. “All you have to do is…” a frustration and maybe even a defense against the damage caused by the addict.

I’m absolutely not trying to detract from or minimize what you experienced, but neither can I offer an exception in your case that it changes what the addict should do, and also I am in no way trying to be an apologist for the addict. It’s a shit situation. If it were easy we wouldn’t be having this conversation.