All therapists aren’t the same, if you don’t click with someone after a session or two that’s completely a valid reason to dump them and try a different one. I know it can be disheartening if you have to go through a few, especially when getting to the point that you’re in therapy to begin with is already so much work. But from personal experience I would say it’s definitely worth it.

Be sure to bring up that you have a hard time opening up and trusting people, it’s definitely relevant to why you’re there and it’s a pretty common problem to have when seeing a therapist. Any good therapist will be able to help you find strategies for ways to work around it, like writing things out ahead of time if that’s easier for you.

It sounds like you’ve had a hell of a rough time with it, I hope you get some good rest and healing soon.