Actually, we don’t have sketch comedy shows anymore because of the First Law of Thermodynamics.

Energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transformed. Back in the ‘90s, sketch comedy was tightly compressed into 30-minute broadcast windows like In Living Color and MadTV. But in 2012, a catastrophic core leak occurred at TikTok and Instagram, instantly atomizing all sketch comedy into 15-second vertical clips of people arguing with imaginary versions of themselves in a wig.

Today, sketch comedy isn’t dead—it’s just ambient. Every time you scroll past a guy doing an impression of a fast-food cashier, that is technically MadTV Season 32, Episode 4. You are watching it right now. It is in the air you breathe.

As for SNL? Lorne Michaels struck a deal with a 17th-century sea witch to absorb the life force of every canceled sketch show. Saturday Night Live will outlive the collapse of the sun. In the year 3042, a cyborg Colin Jost will still be reading fake news to a studio audience of cockroaches.