Comment on How to deal with people who obtusely miss your point on Lemmy?
schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 3 days agoYou said, “your answer kind of proves the point to me.” I was asking what it was that I said and what point it proved.
I was worried maybe such a brief question would be interpreted as hostile, but you had assured me the atypical people, of which you claimed to be, don’t think that way, that it is is merely an annoying trait of NTs.
I’m starting to think that maybe you are over-interpreting autism into this context. Not that double-bind communication doesn’t exist (thank you for sharing that, btw), but on-line we do away with much of the bother of non-verbal communication (as well as the ability to easily skip over boring conversations and the ability to obliquely reference shit knowing SOMEONE is going to get it), so there is much more parity between NT and atypical people.
I say this as someone with over 1k/comments Lemmy a month after having been here two months, and after having done all my “socializing” on line all my life–but it usually amounts to just this, having a series of one-off conversations with strangers, and it’s the best I can do, socially.
Strider@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Hey, thanks for continuing. I have to say, you’re possibly right with overthinking. That’s what we do. And hence, we often jump around to the point of getting lost in our own line of thinking - the latter being exactly what happened.
I am now trying to read through the fragments and have a very hard time following myself. If we were sitting together it might be easier, doing this asynchronous is hard work. So thanks for putting up with that and your effort.
Let me do some jumping around mobile and desktop and see of I can follow up.
schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
No worries. I discovered the autism lemmy and think I have broad phenotype autism, so I’m always interested in learning more.
I worked at a tech place and got along with everyone there. I thought it meant I was likable and it just different places are going to have different vibes, but someone pointed out tech people tend towards autism, so maybe all that was happening was that I find myself with a group of people who naturally shared my communication style… and that, basically still, I’m unlikable.
Strider@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Not unlikable, that’s important. You be yourself. Masking will put a heavy strain on you, find your people.
We don’t get much external positive reinforcement so the negative tends to stick and impact our self esteem, it’s a negative loop.
schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
Oh, hey, Strider. I’m the guy you had an imaginary confrontation with in a thread yesterday. We were talking about autism. I thought I’d find you here!
Yeah, my problem is that I’m not finding my people anywhere, and I’m getting old. I’m thinking I need to explore Mastodon and MakerTube, because I’m not finding people in meatspace and not even really on-line either.