Comment on How do people easily find out that I'm an easy to pick up on?
throwingthisfr@lemmy.cafe 1 day agoI often laugh over the jokes people make on me. And I try getting back at them too. I can understand that level of playful ribbing.
But if it happens too often and too mean to start to take notice. Even some of my good coworkers took notice of it too and called it out.
The_v@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Your coworkers called it out but you did not. So the aggressors thought “you are fine with it.”
Social nuances are difficult to manage. When social ribbing goes to far you have to learn to set limits.
The key is to show that you are displeased with their behavior and address it immediately.
“What the hell, not cool.”
“That’s an asshole thing to say.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“That’s inappropriate”
Non-verbally you can just give them a stare, then frown, and slowly shake your head. Treat them like a naughty child getting in trouble with the teacher.
Once you communicate your limits, it sets boundaries for them to be comfortable with.
If they don’t stop. You can get much more aggressive.
“Just a moment, my lawyer wants me to write down what you say as soon as I can for the harassment lawsuit.” Said with a big innocent smile, this scares the shit out of most people.
throwingthisfr@lemmy.cafe 1 day ago
Damn, you might be right. I have looked on it in totally different way. When people call out “hey don’t bully that guy”, I psychologically feel they’re just confirming that I’m the one on the losing end here and immediately start being defensive. I feel I’m restoring my dignity somewhat there by defending that I’m okay in that situation. I haven’t realised this until you pointed this out lol sounds so obvious.
From now on, I’ll try to aggressively latch to person coming on to aid me.
0xKesh@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
In my early 20’s (like 21-22) I worked in a work environment that is notoriously big for everyone giving each other shit at work (trades and labouring).
One thing I picked up on very fast was that you had to set those limits on how much crap you can take as a joke. It also made it really easy to know when an actual fight was about to break out because both parties would step over those lines immediately haha.
Anyway, I’ve done this at every job since and personally I’ve never had an issue with workplace bullying or anything. I swear the workplace is just the schoolyard for adults lol