Happy birthday to your brother. Truck guys are never forgotten - they become legends.
“I knew this one guy who showed up in a beater of truck smelling of pine and diesel. He helped me move my bed once. He refused my money, but gladly took the beer I offered. After the move, we leaned on the bed of his truck with our elbows raised along its rim. We talked for an hour about sports, music, and television. After awhile he stopped leaning on the truck and said, ‘Welp…’ and dusted off his pants. Without knowing the meaning, I knew exactly his purpose. We shook hands and he drove off into the sunset to help the next poor, truck-less soul.”
AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world 1 month ago
“would be”, “was” — am I to take this to mean that your brother is no longer with us? If so, I am sorry for your loss.
If I have intuited this correctly, then I hope that some day, you can be the “truck guy” for other people. The truck is optional honestly — just as long you carry with you the spirit of helpfulness and trust in reciprocal community support.
ChanchoManco@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Yep you’re right, its the first year since a lung cancer got him, fuck cancer and fuck smoking.
He had a way to connect people that I just can’t, but I’ll try anyway. Thanks for the kind words.
AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Yeah, I feel you. I lost my best friend to COVID back in 2021. He was a charismatic whirlwind of a man, who seemed to exude an aura of safety and welcomingness. I’m a pretty loud person myself, so I would’ve never seen myself in the “sidekick” niche, but alongside a big personality such as him, it was a role I was happy to fill.
When he died, I had a moment of going “well damn. I thought I was going to be the inevitably doomed sidekick to his hero story. Does this mean I need to try ‘be the hero’? How the hell do I do that?”. The world needs energy like his now more than ever, so it feels like it’s my duty to learn from him and help fill the niche that he left behind. It’s a tricky job though, because I’ll never be able to be like him. I have made some progress in learning how to emulate the impact he had on the world but in a “me” way. If nothing else, trying to do this helps me feel closer to him, and helps me to grieve his absence.
It sounds like you’re facing a similar challenge. I wish you luck on that quest, and again, I’m sorry for your loss