Comment on Value of X has fallen 71% since purchase by Musk and name change from Twitter

crandlecan@mander.xyz ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

• agegamon@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Literally only the best strategies here! I mean lets recap:

  • Threaten to buy company then double down and agree in writing as a bullying tactic: check
  • Roll a nat 1 on your intimidation check: check
  • Be forced to follow through when called out on being mentally an 8 yo by the feds: check
  • Fire critical employees, like basically all of them: check
  • Yoink verification away from public news orgs: check
  • Let anyone pay to be “legit,” even if they’re parodying you: check
  • Rename to stupidest thing imagined since head-on (apply directly to the forehead): check
  • Gut content moderation policies but also stop enforcing regardless: check
  • Post own hate content and racism to the platform: check
  • "Accidentally" run ads next to hate content: check
  • Be told your sign sucks and to take it down by city: check (lol)
  • Become a living embodiment of “big yikes” energy while telling aforementioned advertisers to “go fuck yourselves” on live TV: check
  • Hallucinate about making company a libertarian wechat alternative: check
  • Tank the value of the company while blaming literally anyone else for your failures: mission in progress, #1 priority

  10/10 solid buy, gonna grab some long calls rn. The koch boys and rupert murderjock must be holding back a tsunami of jealousy by now 🤣

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  • Thisfox@sopuli.xyz ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    You left out “throttle diaster information accounts when the disaster is happening” (Japan earthquake).

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    • agegamon@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Check!

      Also, I forgot all the tomfuckery he pulled with starlink in Ukraine, cutting off access and the like.

      It’s truly a testament to how much shit this guy has done that we forget so much of it.

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  • crandlecan@mander.xyz ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    See! This guy gets it!! 😍

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• some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  He’s a genius playing 8D chess. You just don’t understand. By this time next week, Twitter will be the only website in the world and Lonnie will laugh at you from mars. Just watch!

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  • renard_roux@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Insert Bond Villain Plot™ where he’s secretly buying all the EMP-hardened server parks in the world, and it’s getting ready to orbital-nuke everything except Shitter servers back to the stone age.

    And of course he will brick every phone and computer everywhere, so nobody will be able to use Shitter, but God damnit, it will be the only site left!

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• Powderhorn@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I’m pretty certain I know how Musk would respond to this. It’s inappropriate for Beehaw.

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  • hydroptic@sopuli.xyz ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Something something woke mind virus something

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    • averyminya@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Or some bs like I didn’t make my money by being nice.

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