The original capitalist fire brigade were local companies that a business owner or homeowner could pay to come and put out a fire. They were given a cast iron plaque, called a “Fire Mark,” to put on their building, next to the door. When the fire brigade showed up, and there was no Fire Mark, they’d just watch the building burn down, unless the owner paid immediately.

When cities decided that was a terrible system, those fire brigade companies morphed into the first insurance companies, and they’ve been parasites on our lives ever since.