I told you, she’s totally yandere! She tied me and carved her initial on my arm with a knife!

No, wait, I did it to myself, as a proof of love. No, wait, it was part of the secret organisation I used to belong to. Sorry, actually I got it in an accident, as I was covering a puppy with my arm. No, wait, it was chemicals, but I was developing a cure for cancer, not dumb stuff like mixing calcium carbide with water! 😜