Auster@thebrainbin.org 3 weeks ago
On the fediverse, from what I read, no, name is final. Apparently that's because in the fediverse, there's no underlying user ID, so an instance checks the user at (@) a given instance, not someone else for the same contents. And forcefully replacing could cause issues, going by some instance that changed the software soon but not enough, making connected instances have issues handling content mismatch.
Auster@thebrainbin.org 3 weeks ago
Also a bit of a tangent, but if it's also your last name, I don't see what's the problem of using it? Multiple people may have the same one, so there isn't an exclusivity on name usage.
And if people are picking on her because of the shared name, see if people doing so reveal their names. And if not, ask them to, to either disarm them or reveal their intentions.