The upside to Teams is that you can always claim it’s at fault for your fuckup. It has so many bugs that no one can ever say that something can’t go wrong because of teams.

• Fell asleep at your desk and didn’t see an important message or call? => "Dang, so sorry, Teams never sent me a notification!"
• Way too late to a scheduled meeting => "Omg hi, finally! Teams crashed every time I tried to enter the meeting!"
• Hungover and don’t want to turn on the camera => "I’m sorry, Teams starts stuttering every time I turn on the camera, so I’m keeping it off for now."
• Forgot to get back to someone? => "Huh but I wrote you like a week ago… weird, Teams must have swallowed the message"
• Don’t want to answer a tough question in a meeting? => “Sorry, your audio keeps cutting out for me. Just one moment, let me restart Teams.” pretend to struggle for 20mins and give up without answering the question