Comment on What happens to cult leaders in prison?
IronBird@lemmy.world 12 hours agodamn, I…found myself doing this to someone recently, i thought i was being honest but just thinking back on it i wasnt, not entirely. they probably thought I was a crazy person obsessed with them, so they cut contact with me entirely like any sane woman would do.
the idea this person could now be going around in life looking over their shoulder, worried i’m stalking them is tearing at me
i want to apologize to this woman so she can be at ease but the only ways i can think of do so would only confirm i’m crazy/stalking them…
Varyk@sh.itjust.works 11 hours ago
Dang, it’s pretty common behavior, unfortunately. I’ve been guilty of it.
At least you’ve recognized your manipulation; that means you can change.
It doesn’t sound like you should interact with this woman you’re referring to any more, because an apology won’t help her with what’s already happened and being around you at all could upset her more.
But the world is big and keeps going on. You could try to make amends by being supportive and helpful to other people, even those you don’t know yet, counter your negative experiences with positive ones.
Maybe one day after you’re more in control of those manipulative tendencies, the opportunity will come up for you to apologize.
If it doesn’t, it doesn’t, but you can become a positive experience in people’s lives going forward, regardless.
IronBird@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
yeah…too late for that, just edited my post with more info.
Varyk@sh.itjust.works 11 hours ago
If it goes through, it goes, if it doesn’t it doesn’t.
If you’ve already upset her enough that she’s cut contact, she likely won’t respond either way.
And either way, you can let her get back to her life and try to become a positive experience in other people’s lives going forward.
IronBird@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
thankfully they live on other side of country, so we really should never run into each other again unless the fates deem it so.
it was kind of a “girl from highschool i had always wanted to ask out, but never had the confidence to”-scenario. childhood trauma from my time at that school made me remember it, and eventually her, so I looked her up…see how she was doing, noticed she was still single, figured I’d take my shot. let my emotions get the best of me and it i guess (really got to be cognizant of these acid flashbacks)…