The cheese wheels are getting progressively smaller

Different cheeses are different sizes. I’m no cheese master but I think it’s a comté, a brie, and a Camembert in order of size.

2 cups of wine

Two glasses for two people? You share a cheese plate. We aren’t selfish fat idiots in Europe.

The sauce bowl is barely bigger than a grape

What do you mean, its almost the size of all the grapes together? We don’t drown all our food in gallons of sauce like mad men. The food itself actually has taste opposed to whatever McD serves for breakfast.

That purple sausage

Look up a Saucisse Sèche d’Auvergne. They do look like that.

The pickles in the edge are even smaller than the grapes.

It’s cornichons. They are that small.

Sausage baked into pound cake for breakfast seems odd

It’s bread. Not cake. Bread and sausage is extremely common together. I’m not French and haven’t seen this variation but in and of itself this would be a stupid indicator of AI.