I would recommend considering that you are currently going through a mental breakdown, just one that is different from others you have experienced.

I also suggest focusing on making friends, rather than getting caught up in global conspiracies. Maybe they’re happening, maybe not, who knows? But either way, what are you, personally going to do about it? Post on Lemmy? Odds are, you can’t do anything about it, so you might as well just make friends and be happy. And if you are gonna do something about it - overthrow the evil shadow regime or whatever - then you will need friends to do it. So go make friends!