In highschool I was in shop class with some idiots that were messing around with a running table saw. The teacher saw the obvious kick back danger and swooped down on them with an angry “Hay! Do you want to have kids?!”. Before I could stop myself I said “Damn, you should at least buy them dinner first.”

He was not amused, but I am still proud of the one time in my life I was quick witted enough to come up with something funny on the spot. It’s been so years 30 years since, and nothing has come close.