I was in a similar situation, but as the boyfriend at the time

I’d driven 1.5hr away to see my then girlfriend at college. We went out for groceries and were just pulling into her campus, making a left on a yellow when a cyclist went straight on a yellow. She flipped over the hood of my car and broke her collarbone.

I’d almost come to a complete stop when the actual collision happened but was still on the hook for the fines and license points for failing to yield.

The girl I hit didn’t press charges or anything. And as far as I’m aware she’s doing ok.

Despite the trauma, I kept driving out of necessity, I had to get 80+ miles home somehow and I definitely wasn’t going to Uber from there.

Now we got married, and we both have long commutes for our jobs (in opposite directions unfortunately, we just moved to a more central spot for it) and our jobs require travel between multiple locations throughout the day.

Quitting driving would’ve kept us from job opportunities that allow us to have the lifestyle we live today.

I don’t think you’re overreacting, but imo you shouldn’t let something like that define your adult life. Accidents happen, and this was probably the best-cass scenario in your case.