Comment on Minecraft confuses me
eepydeeby@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 days agoI don’t think it’s tangentially related? You have effectively contrasted the Right Thing To Do comment with your experience of the Wrong Thing To Do as well as its terrible, lifelong impact.
I too had that flavor of (let’s say unkind) upbringing and now I devote every waking moment to tearing that garbage out of me and installing something more like what u/moakley described
dingus@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Thanks for helping to validate my comment haha. I do appreciate it.
Is there anything specific you’ve done and would recommend to help swing in the other direction like you’ve stated?
Was curious as to what you might have found helpful. I had tried the beginnings of CBT in the past, but it just makes me feel bad and frustrated. I have always been taught that my thoughts and feelings are wrong, and that’s effectively the core of CBT. I don’t like it because it just propagates how everything I think and feel is invalid. Yet it’s the “trendy” thing to do nowadays so every therapist and their mother uses it as their modality.
Interestingly though I don’t think that this issue necessarily stems from deliberately toxic parents. My mom did the best she could and is very loving and nurturing but I was just too much for her to know how to deal with in this way.
emeralddawn45@discuss.tchncs.de 2 days ago
CBT is not supposed to teach that your thoughts or feelings are ‘wrong’ just that they can be harmful or unhelpful, and give you strategies to move past them when thats the case. Thats what emotional regulation is, and what ideal parents would teach chldren. Its perfectly valid to have a negative emotion, but not all responses to it are appropriate, and there’s no point in getting stuck on a negative emotion jist because it’s ‘valid’ especially if that can be harmful to yourself or others. Its fine to feel sad or angry, but its not healthy to want to stay that way. Youre suplosed to recognize why you’re sad and angry, take steps to fix it if you can, and move past it.