Comment on am i responsible if i hurt someone by leaving them after "making" them fall in love with me?

• gloktawasright@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

  Well if you’re not interested in long term relationships at all, then yeah, be upfront about that. First or second date for sure.

  Waiting a month is douchebag territory I’d say.

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  • fuckyou1@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

    what do you mean by date?

    my actions will probably show i want a long term relationship, even though my words say otherwise. what if they can’t comprehend that?

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    • gloktawasright@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      A date in this context is a time when you meet up with a potential romantic or sexual partner with the intention of having fun together doing some sort of activity.

      So first or second time you meet them you should tell them of your intentions as far as commitment is concerned, some might even say before you meet up at all. And definitely before any kind of sex.

      As for conflicts between what you say and how you act, that can be tricky for some people, but I would say that you should address that specifically by saying something like “I do tend to act in a way that a lot of people would interpret as long term commitment energy, but I need to be clear that this is just how I behave in relationships, and it doesn’t mean that I plan to stick around. I still am only interested in short term commitments at this time and only if I explicitly tell you otherwise should you think anything else”.

      Just say what you think and feel and do so upfront and multiple times. Be open and honest and allow them to make their own decisions without guilting or pressuring them.

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      • fuckyou1@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

        “I do tend to act in a way that a lot of people would interpret as long term commitment energy, but I need to be clear that this is just how I behave in relationships, and it doesn’t mean that I plan to stick around. I still am only interested in short term commitments at this time and only if I explicitly tell you otherwise should you think anything else”

        maybe i should make them sign a form too lol?

        that would make me feel relaxed

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      • fuckyou1@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

        So first or second time you meet them you should tell them of your intentions as far as commitment is concerned, some might even say before you meet up at all. And definitely before any kind of sex.

        but wouldn’t it be weird to say i don’t like commitment that soon?

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