The original post: /r/television by /u/No_Information_8814 on 2026-02-18 15:43:13+00:00.
Do you guys ever watch something over and over and start to see a pattern? That’s been me the past few days watching Monsters Inside Me, one of those shows that Animal Planet/Discovery Fit puts on to remind you that everything wants to murder you. The following is what a regular episode of MIM sounds like.
Narrator: NATURE’S DEADLIEST ORGANISMS THEY CRAWLED UP FROM HELL THEY WILL KILL YOU THEY ARE PARASITES
Kevin the Parasite Victim: I’m itchy
Narrator: KEVIN THINKS THAT THIS IS JUST AN ORDINARY RASH
Kevin the Parasite Victim: I figured it would just go away. \DRAMATIC ZOOM IN ON EYEBALL\
Narrator: LATER THAT NIGHT, KEVIN EXPERIENCES A BIZARRE NEW SYMPTOM
Kevin: I have an ouchie in my elbows
Kevin’s Wife: I thought something was wrong, so I took Kevin to the hospital.
Narrator: KEVIN IS TRANSPORTED TO THE HOSPITAL BUT DOCTORS DON’T KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON.
Kevin: The doctors did not know what was going. They didn’t cure me, which is why the narrator doesn’t say anything about them.
Narrator: HE IS TRANSFERRED TO DR. PARASITE-ERSON
Doctor Parasite-erson: I looked at Kevin and thought oh wow he sure has a parasite. He had elbow ouchie and a rash. I diagnosed him with toxocara leishmaniasis larvae amoeba.
Narrator: TOXICARA LEISHMANIASIS LARVAE AMOEBA IS A DISEASE THAT ATTACKS THE LOWER LEFT LUNG. WHICH LED TO KEVIN’S ITCH AND ELBOW OUCHIE.
Kevin: I was like oh wow I have a parasite.
Narrator: KEVIN IS LEFT WITH THE QUESTION OF HOW DID THE TOXICARA LEISHMANIASIS LARVAE AMOEBA GET INTO KEVIN’S BODY
Kevin: I didn’t tell anyone, but I like to tap dance barefoot on rusty nails
Doctor Parasite-erson: I gave him a toxicara leishmaniasis larvae amoeba pill.
Kevin’s Wife: I thought Kevin was going to die. We could only hope the next day.
Narrator: THE NEXT DAY, KEVIN’S WIFE SEES SOME PROGRESS
Kevin’s Wife: Kevin woke up and I was like “yay you’re alive”
Kevin: I gotta live my life to the fullest. Life is good, life is great.
Narrator: TODAY, KEVIN IS ALIVE. HE NOW TAP DANCES ON DIRTY NEEDLES. GO TO ANIMALPLANET.COM TO LEARN MORE ABOUT DANCING ON DIRTY NEEDLES.