This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/nfl by /u/BryLinds on 2025-12-26 17:18:59+00:00.


Alabama

Alaska

Arizona

Arkansas

California

Colorado

Connecticut

Delaware

Florida

Georgia

Hawaii

Idaho

Illinois

Indiana

Iowa

Kansas

Kentucky

Louisiana

Maine

Maryland

Massachusetts

Michigan

Minnesota

Mississippi

Missouri

Montana

Nebraska

Nevada

New Hampshire

New Jersey

New Mexico

New York

North Carolina

North Dakota

Ohio

Oklahoma

Oregon

Pennsylvania

Rhode Island

South Carolina

South Dakota

Tennessee

Texas

Utah

Vermont

Washington

Washington DC

Virginia

West Virginia

Canada

Wisconsin

Wyoming

Well gents this took a really long time Im ngl. First Im going to hand out the awards and go over some of the data, then I’ll talk about the process team by team.

Without further ado, LESGO

First of all

Let’s take a look at the graph of states

The number of the states chanting E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES is not as bountiful as I once thought. Enough to win an election sure but the farther north you are you’re skoling. Let’s take a look at some of the anomalies:

  • The Cardinals managed not one but two states in Minnesota and North Dakota

-Nevada was split with an even number of Packers and Bengals schools

-The Commanders won Mississippi. I know what you are Mississippi. You can’t see it but imagine Doakes.

-The Bengals Split West Virginia with Philly

  • The Bears won Alaska, Split New Mexico

  • The Packers won Louisiana and New Hampshire, split a few others

-Idaho was split between Green Bay and Minnesota

-Montana is the Northernmost Eagles State, North Carolina is the Southernmost Vikings State

-Indiana was split between our top two

-The Rams won New Jersey, split Maryland with Philly

And now for the Multi Splits

  • Utah was the most populous Multi Split as Philly, the Rams and the Falcons all got three. every other split was one school copying one team.

-You can’t see it but DC has the Colts, Lions and Bears splitting that small small place

-2 Five Splits, Vermont and Wyoming. Vermont has Atlanta, Philly, Minnesota, the Broncos and the Chiefs.

-Wyoming has Minnesota, Green Bay, Philly, Carolina and Buffalo

-Hawaii has 6. Arizona, Minnesota, Chicago, Tampa, Green Bay and Philly.

And let’s see the divisional stats and standings:

But without further ado

YOUR WINNER OF THE SILVER FOOTBALL TOUCHDOWN SCULPTURE IS-

[Opens up Envelope]

ITS A TIE!?

But brylinds how could this be? Philadelphia nearly doubled the second place team.

But see dear reader, they did tie on a technicality.

WITH CLEVELAND!

Yes dear readers, due to Cleveland just being a helmet and pretty much every school listed wears a helmet, CLEVELAND WINS

But if we did it my way yes Philadelphia wins.

PHILLY, CLEVELAND

Enjoy it boys

THE MOST COPIED DIVISION:

THE NFC NORTH!

well also technically the AFC North as well but Yknow

NFC North: 663

Minnesota- 290

Green Bay- 176

Chicago- 124

Detroit- 73

✨Power of Friendship✨

NFC East : 647

Philadelphia- 465

Washington- 77

Cowboys- 72

Giants -34

A HARD Carry job by Philly that wouldn’t have been as close if Dallas didn’t go a bit crazy on the multiplier rule

NFC West: 316 (HELL YEAH)

LA Rams- 143

Arizona- 103

San Francisco- 53

Seattle- 17

Mamma Mia that’s a lopsided division

NFC South: 278

Atlanta-130

Tampa-107

Carolina -22

New Orleans-19

Never mind, this is more lopsided with an 85 logo difference

AFC West- 259

Denver- 100

Kansas City- 73

LA Chargers- 54

Vegas- 32

TEAMWORK!

AFC South: 170

Jacksonville - 56

Indianapolis- 54

Tennessee- 49

Houston Texans- 11

If you want to add the Oilers, 181

AFC East: 163

New England- 112

NY Jets - 27

Buffalo- 21

Miami- 3

A HARD carry job by New England

AFC North: 100

Cincinnati - 77

Baltimore - 17

Cleveland - 6

Pittsburgh- BIG OL GOOSE EGG

Cincinnati was the only team that tried. But granted, Baltimore just got here, Cleveland and Pittsburgh are unique snowflakes.

Speaking off

THE SPECIAL SNOWFLAKES AWARDS

Look we all knew who it was going to be for a long ass time. But do not hang your heads Steelers fans. While high schools all across two countries went on and diluted your in state brethren’s brand to the nth degree, No one, absolutely NO ONE EXCEPT HUACHIPATO FC IN CHILE C…


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