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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Round-Tumbleweed2582 on 2023-10-03 21:09:00.
I (36F) am a white girl married into a Japanese family. My husband’s family has never really accepted me because I am white but they’re not that bad most of the time. Usually, they are just cold but my SIL is very hostile especially when it comes to food. I don’t like Sushi and my SIL always tried to get me to eat it and has yelled at me for things like using too much soy sauce, eating my dumpling whole and not dipping it in sauce first, mixing wasabi with my soy sauce, drinking sake with rice, etc.
Recently we went out for dinner with them for my birthday. I am okay with chopsticks but I still struggle with them sometimes, I was trying to pick up a piece of meat and I just used one of the chopsticks to stab the meat and eat it. SIL immediately started yelling at me saying I was disrespectful.I told her I would eat my food however I liked and to please mind her own business. She always does this and I have had enough, people can eat however they like. I am sick of her picking at my food habits.
She said I was being disrespectful to her culture, I told her how I chose to eat food is my choice and to mind her own business. Things got ugly and I left. My husband stayed with them.I have been married to him for 5 years and dating for 7, I have learned his language and speak Japanese with his family. His family has had none of that same respect for me, to this day none of his family has ever tried Egyptian food or tried to learn the language, I have been expected to learn it even though they speak perfect English. We live in Europe yet I am always expected to conform to his culture. AITA?
Edit: Every time I ask for a fork his family gets very offended so I can’t ask for one. 99% of the time I do okay with chopsticks, this piece was just tiny and slippery. I used the bottom chopstick to just poke it a little for extra grip then used the other one.