This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/throwaway127768 on 2023-10-02 21:59:54.

I met a guy not long ago, and he was the first guy I’ve been genuinely excited about in a while. It’s been almost 2 years that I’ve been single, and just haven’t felt like entertaining anything or anyone. But this guy, i was very excited for.

So, long story short, he asked me one day during spicy texting if I have ever had a threesome. I responded honestly, which was yes, 5 years ago i did. Told him I didn’t much enjoy it, hence 5 years ago being the last time i did it. This was apparently enough to not want to move forward. And while I understand that we both reserved the right to end things at any time, it just felt so odd. He admitted it was due to insecurity, and I definitely was far more understanding than I feel he deserved in this situation.

Also, I asked him if the situation would’ve been different if it was a 2 girl 1 guy threesome. He said yes. So not only is this guy insecure, but he definitely has so misogyny going on. It’s just so odd, this isn’t who I thought he was at all. And I’m thankful he showed his colors/our incompatibility early on but it’s still triggering that “must fix this!” and desire for him to say sorry and that he wants me.

I should have just said “well ok, bye!”. But it really triggered something within in me to want him more, and surely I was a little desperate sounding, sending long texts, etc. but it wasn’t like he wasn’t entertaining it, like he was dangling something in front of me that he knew I wanted for his own amusement.

Today he shares a post with me on insta after not talking for a few days, and in response I’m a little rude back which I now understand was my attempts at bids for his affection. His response was to remove me as a follower and unfollow me- a hit to the ego for sure.

Not my finest moment, but I can’t change it. I’m not going to text him despite me wanting to fix the situation - I’m going to leave it where it is.

But I feel disappointed with myself for entertaining the game. I just feel like I should’ve been stronger and let him go at his initial attempt after the threesome thing.

Any advice for moving forward when you feel rejected and upset with yourself because you knew better?

How do you deal with the overwhelming urge to prove yourself when rejected?