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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/engineerdoinglife on 2023-10-01 00:19:57.

My husband (34M) and my (31F) wedding anniversary was this week, but we delayed celebrating until this weekend. We do traditional gifts for anniversaries and this year is flowers/fruit. He is not great with gifts and asked for ideas last month and I sent him a link to an Etsy shop that makes “birth flower jewelry” and told him I’d like something with our sons birth flower. I also let him know he could just get me flowers or anything else and that would be fine as well.

For his gift I picked up chocolate covered strawberries, wine (because grapes,) and went to a fancy cheese shop to get some fruit infused cheeses, meat, etc to make a really nice charcuterie spread for tonight. I’m going to create a “picnic” in our living room, and I think it’s going to be really cute. I also got him a card and wrote a heartfelt message. Just for reference.

I assumed that he had figured my gift out BEFORE our anniversary, so imagine my surprise when I opened a prime box and found a jewelry box. I didn’t open it but it was labelled birth flower necklace” so it was obvious. Honestly I’m a little disappointed but I’m not sure if I’m being unfair and could use some perspective.

  1. If he ordered the gift via prime that means that he didn’t order it until after the actual day of our anniversary had passed.
  2. The box was labelled with MY birth flower, not my sons. Which is not what I wanted.
  3. The box/labelling looks very cheap, and looking on Amazon I think he ordered a low quality piece (think Chinese Amazon front, <$20.) when we were younger I would wear jewelry like this and it would always fall apart, color my skin, and/or tarnish quickly.

I’m a bit upset. I spent a significant amount of consideration and money on his gift and he totally flubbed mine in a way that specifically seems very uncaring. He’s going to be giving me the gift tonight so I have about 4 hours to figure out how I’m going to respond. I don’t want to ruin our plans with a fight but I’d like to (gently) tell him I’d rather he order something I will actually wear. Or should I just thank him, not say anything, and just not wear the gift? Am I being entitled?