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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/whatinyourwhat on 2023-09-26 03:43:28.


Not sure of I’m looking for advice or to commiserate, but this happened first thing when I got to work and I’m still angry when I think about it.

Back story: I’m an engineer for a large company, one of the parts of the company is nutrition where we make things in bottles with twist off caps. One of the specs we measure is removal torque of the cap. If it’s not on tight enough, there isn’t a seal; if it’s on too tight, it’s too hard for consumers to get off.

Recently, a daily task was given to me to pull the torque data for the past 24 hours to go over in a morning touch base meeting with quality, maintenance, operations, etc. The meeting is at 9:30 and they wanted it from 9 am the previous day to 9 am that day. I told them that that wouldn’t be possible to have ready for the meeting and I asked to pull it before I left the day before. So on Friday mornings we review the data from Wednesday at 4 pm to Thursday at 4 pm. On Monday we review the data from Thursday to Friday.

Last pieces to the puzzle is that my specific line was down from Tuesday afternoon until Thursday evening. I was also off on Friday.

Actual story: This morning I show up to work and go straight to the morning meeting. The manager of operations wants to review torque data and I tell him that it was not pulled on Friday as I was out and no one covered that part of my job. He immediately is agitated and starts yelling at me asking why no one did this, why wasn’t it covered, etc. I try to calmly explain that I was out on scheduled PTO, my supervisor should have made sure there was coverage for my job, and that I would pull it when I go back to my desk. He just keeps going though, almost berating me over this data that was not pulled and how I need to make sure it get pulled even if I’m off and how unacceptable every answer I give him is. Honestly, I saw red, I was so pissed. And I am actually proud of myself for not taking his yelling laying down, not apologizing, and staying calm.

After this meeting, even one of the other engineers said something to me about it and could tell I was mad. Not only did he yell at me, but he yelled at me in a multidisciplinary meeting in front of a dozen people.

The icing on the cake this morning was that my manager emailed me very shortly after asking why the torque data spreadsheet hadn’t been updated since Tuesday afternoon. Reminder, the line didn’t run from Tuesday until Thursday evening and I wasn’t here Friday to pull the data.

Normally, I would have been annoyed and moved on, but after getting yelled at by a man so far out of my reporting structure, I was ready to quit. She has been know to go behind me and recheck my decisions and requests and question me or just reply and change it to what she thinks. If you don’t trust me to do my job and are just going to come behind me and do it anyway, why am I even here?

Luckily, no one was using the conference room after us, so I was able to stay behind and cry a little and calm myself down. I went back to my desk and found out my friend was leaving so I took his office for the day and just worked and listened to music.

As annoyed as I was with my manager, I sent her an email as I left work explaining briefly what happened this morning. I told her it was absolutely uncalled for and unprofessional and that if it happens again I am walking away and escalating it.