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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/hanriettee on 2023-09-25 20:32:55.


My brother and SIL are having a baby. Everyone is rather happy and are talking about it etc. So the other day I was talking with my aunt about it and she mentioned christening and then asked me when I would do confirmation. For those who don’t know - confirmation is like adult baptism, where for christians is the affirmation of your belief in God. In my country almost everyone has it, because it is a part of religion class in secondary school. But I did not attend the class so I do not have confirmation.

I never believed in God, even when I was a child and I was very vocal about it to my father. He stopped trying to force the belief on me after the first communion and it wasn’t even a fight to get him to sign me an excuse from the religion class for the rest of my education. Both grandmothers and grandfathers did not know about it. I never mentioned it and whenever the topic came I just didn’t participate even when I knew they were trying to bait me. I also figured that I don’t have to go to church by the age of 11, because they let me go alone. So every Sunday I was going on a walk.

I think my atheism came out at the time everyone my age was supposed to get confirmation. Nobody commented on it, but I think that they noticed that I didn’t invite anyone to the ceremony. And suddenly after that everyone stopped trying to talk about God around me.

But some days ago my aunt asked me when I was going to confirm, because this is my first nephew/niece and I have to be a godmother. I thought that she was joking, but she told me that I can pay a priest to get it in a week. I told her that I am not going to do that as this is against not only my views but also I think that this is disrespectful to people who actually believe in God. She told me that it’s unfair to my brother and I always have to be vocal about my atheism etc., but I successfully changed the topic.

The thing is - I never said anything. I always avoid the topic while I feel that my family tries to bait and force me on their beliefs. Also I think that they are hypocrites, because only my maternal grandparents are regularly going to church. I don’t understand why they whould bully me into faith when they should be happy for my brother and SIL baby. And I say they, because I have a feeling that this topic won’t end with my aunt.