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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/redlightgamers on 2023-09-24 19:34:17.
My wife’s cousin and her family (Husband, 6 yr old child, new born, and Husband’s mother) were visiting the states from Pakistan. They were staying up north with another cousin, and wanted to come down to visit my wife’s mother (who is currently staying at my wife’s sister’s house). Both us and my wife’s sister live 15 minutes apart. My wife’s sister invited them over to stay at her apartment. Now a week before they are about to come, my wife’s sister asked if we can host them instead, since we have a bigger house (We have a 4 bedroom vs 2 bedroom). I said no because I work from home (my wife works at the hospital) and we were not planning for this. We don’t have any kids, so then it would just be me and her cousins family staying at our house on the weekdays where I will be occupied with work. My wife’s sister said that they will visit her house during the day, but that they would just need a place to sleep. However, I don’t know how true this would really be. I also have never met any of these people, and this would be the first time I am meeting my wife’s cousin and her family. I don’t know how her kid is behaved or not, nor is our house as kid friendly. I mentioned to my wife that had we known in advance (say a month prior) we could’ve accommodated and mentally prepared. Now my wife’s sister is calling me (through my wife via text) that I am selfish and not the “good guy”. My wife defends me, but I hate that this is causing a rift between close sisters because of a last minute change of plans. My wife’s birthday is this coming week, and because of this my wife’s sister and her family have decided not to come over to her birthday party… which feels like blackmail IMO. I am typically reserved when it comes to inviting people to stay over for a week at our house, but I don’t like the emotional gymnastics that my SIL is playing with my wife. Am I the Asshole?