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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/OctoberJ on 2023-09-24 04:38:11.
I’ve been friends with a couple who moved into my neighborhood for a few years, ever since they moved here. I like being inclusive and welcoming new people; introducing them to new people and being helpful when I can. I get along with the wife, I’ll call Susie, quite well. Her husband, let’s call him Mitch, is also a nice person. He is a trademan, and my husband and I have hired him to do a few jobs. She is his second wife and he is several years older than her, older than me and my husband as well, by a few years. I was taken aback when Susie told me that she questioned her husband whether she needed to worry about me, and flat out told me that’s she’s worried he has a crush on me, even though he told her not to worry.
While they are very nice, they are both morbidly obese. My husband and I are fit, energetic people. I have no attraction to her husband. I told her that I’m happily married to my husband, and I’m not looking for any other guy. But I see it in her face if I’m outside and he stops to chat.
How do I convince her there’s nothing to worry about? If my husband died tomorrow and I was a widow, I would still not have any attraction to her husband. I like them both as friends, and her husband is good at what he does. I’ve given him a great reference several times and he’s gotten some local work because of it. I don’t want her to be jealous though, because I know how that can lead to problems. My husband is kind of a jealous husband because I’m very outgoing and he is not. I don’t want her to feel that way either.
I empathize with her, but I’m not competion by any means.
Any advice is welcome, but I’m not going to stop working out. (Haha! I know I look good, as bad as that sounds, but I work for it.)