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The original was posted on /r/cfb by /u/Sigfantry on 2025-09-04 13:49:30+00:00.

Roadrunners and Bobcats, nUTSAcks and TXSTDs, my fellow Texans. We may hate each other but we are bonded by blood and love of the game. Our rivalry should be the most beloved rivalry in our state surpassed only by Bevo and Reveille. Both of our schools are trending upward each year and our football programs are continuing to develop. Bobcats pulling a crushing defeat last year is really the match that should ignite the rivalry to new levels. With that being said, the battle of I-35 is lame af. I know that folks drive through our respective cities and 95% of what they see is highway but are we really not that creative?

I propose we change the rivalry name to something less ass. Look, I dont have all the answers but I know we can do better.

In its place, I recommend for the council to rename the rivalry something related to either the beloved Hill Country that stretches between our cities or the Comal River that divides our regions but unites us in debauchery and all day drinking.

Forget anything North of Buda and ignore anything outside the greater San Antonio region. This is UTSA vs TXST.

Let us consider the Hill Country. Perfect opportunity especially with the reboot of King of the Hill. We NEED pre game competitions! I want KING OF THE GRILL with local BBQs going head to head to see who has the best BBQ in the Hill country. Hell I would love to see someone from SA set up a pit for al pastor. Get the battles going before the game even starts with an all around Texas classic. Alamo Brewing company in San antonio NEEDS to be sponsoring this showdown. Alamo coozies in every UTSA fan’s hands. I WANT KING OF THE STILLS! Between Devil’s River Distillery, Rebecca Creek, Andalusia, Desert Door distillery, AND so much more to also include AT LEAST 5 or 6 breweries, we the people should not have a moment where we dont have a drink in hand that we can judge harshly even though our standard pour is a shot of Jack washed down with cheap Lone Star (you know who you are and there is no shame). We deserve more. Our new rivalry should be King of the Hills Hill Country Shootout Head to Head in the Hills Winner will be crowned King off the Hills until you can dethrone them next year.

Onto the river. Anyone who has spent their summers in Texas knows this: a day drinking on the river is a day well spent. I propose all of the same stuff from the former idea with maybe a twist on the king of the stills name. Not sure. I put a lot more thought into the first one.

I propose Comal River Clash River Rivalry Whitewater showdown

I dont know, I went to UTSA so all of you might have more creative names than I do.

Closing notes: The Battle of I-35 SUCKS. I want a drink in every hand and a brisket in every belly. I want the rivalry game to be MORE.

Further closing comments for UTSA: Our new combined UTSA and UT HEALTH logo is lame and you should feel bad. I miss having rowdy on the epaulets of the football uniforms

MEEP MEEP

EDIT: Here are some of yalls wonderful recommendations:

Hill Country Hate

Hill Country Clash

The Wurstfest War

The Davy Crockett Solo Cup

The Taco Cabana Late Night Brawl

The Battle for Davy Crockett’s Rifle/Hat

The Buccee’s Bowl

Two Rivers Rivalry

The Battle for the Alamo

The Golden HEB Cart

The Hill Country Calamity

The Alamo Showdown

Dread River Rivalry

The Battle for the Devil’s Backbone

HEBowl

The Balcones Brawl

Battle Royale Involving Somw Carnivorous Eat’n Texans

King of the Hills

Tube War

Battle of the Lazy River

The Bluebonnet Brawl

Which would you vote for? 🤷🏻