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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Character_Leather_54 on 2023-09-23 07:39:35.
So my husband’s bday was last saturday. We also had friends (a couple) come in from across the country that friday. Initially we were planning to go to a steakhouse for his birthday and as a get together. But unfortunately, he unexpectantly had to work so he couldn’t make it. I asked our friends if they mind a last minute change to a fancy sushi place (all 3 of us love sushi, husband prefers steak, and doesn’t even like raw fish).
Anyways, it was definitely fancy. We did omakase with bunch of a la cart. The total for the 3 of us was over 1k.
We celebrated his bday the next day at that steakhouse.
I didn’t tell him about the switch because I didn’t want him to feel left out. Later he was asking if we were ok with eating steak twice in a weekend. So i had to tell him we had sushi. Unfortunately, our friends were really excited to share about our experience (their first time to omakase). He didn’t say anything more about this but in private, he said I essentially celebrated his bday without him. I asked him what did he want me to do with friends across the country staying with us for just a weekend? Go to mcdonalds? So was I an AH for doing a “more fancy and expensive” dinner without my husband on the night of his birthday because he couldn’t join?
Edit:
I didn’t tell him bc he was called into a horrible case and his patient died and he wasn’t even on call. But also i didn’t want him to feel left out (despite it was no one’s fault). Felt guilty enjoying life while he was going through the wrenches. He can’t even tell me exactly why he felt upset. He’s not mad.