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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Mags529 on 2023-09-22 06:27:47.
Ten years ago I (F44) was approached by a company to interview with their CEO for a position I did not apply for. I agreed to take the interview, which was all set up through the CEO’s assistant. It was a Monday morning breakfast meeting at a hotel restaurant. When the day of the interview arrived, I showed up prepared, copy of CV in hand. I did arrive thirty minutes earlier than the meeting time because I didn’t want to take the chance I might be late. So our meeting was at 8AM. When 8AM arrived, he wasn’t around so I thought maybe he’s stuck in traffic. At 8:15, there is no sign of him. At 8:30, there is still no sign of him so I email their assistant who answers immediately with “Let me make sure they have the right restaurant” and then a few moments later they come back with “Please stay - he is en route now!”. It wasn’t until very close to 9AM that the CEO arrives, makes a lame excuse about traffic and then asks the waiter for a menu…and a newspaper. I have a hunch he slept in and/or forgot, but also really surprised he feels there is time for a newspaper. He asks me some really basic questions while eating his breakfast. I think I’m answering them pretty well even though in my head I’m feeling like this interview is not being taken seriously whatsoever. It all ends around 9:20, he says he has a few more candidates but someone will reach out, and we go our separate ways. I’m not feeling good about it at all, but I still send a thank you email for opportunity. He responds back with “Thanks. Best wishes.” I did not hear anything further. It left me feeling somewhat dismissed but more so just really insulted.
Fast forward to last year…one of my closest girlfriends (F42) says she met a nice older man (M56?) through some mutual friends and they’ve had a few nice dates, but it’s not serious. I ask about him and she says “I think you know him, he was CEO of ABC Company.” She remembers me telling her about that awkward interview, and I’m like “ It turns out he is still in my industry, working in a senior (but not c-suite) role at a company connected to mine. II’m not a fan of this person and my girlfriend knows this. She tries to smooth it over by telling me she mentioned me and the awkward interview, but he claims he does not remember it happening. My girlfriend insists with him that it happened and he insists back that it didn’t sound like something he would have done. She comes back and tells me this, which you can imagine, did not help. She jokes “I guess I wont be bringing him to your house anytime soon”.
That was a year ago and they are still together. As I now have a child, I don’t go out often and as a result, haven’t seen her much. When I do it is without him. I know I will have to meet him again at some point, and I will be polite, but I probably will still be feeling this way. Am I the asshole for hanging onto this grudge? Or am I supposed to be ok with the further insult of this guy claiming the awkward interview never happened?