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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Original-Dish905 on 2023-09-21 21:19:17.

I (40f) am the controller at a medium size company. I love my job and have two staff accountants (31f and 34f)and an accounting assistant(23f) I manage. The accounting assistant is amazing. She picks up on everything quick, she’s the sweetest, a very hard worker. However, she is a full time employee and has caused a bunch of trouble in my department.

She is young and has a few pet gerbils but no kids or a spouse. She negotiated 100 hours of PTO and 10 remote days to get her to take her current position because we were despate so she transferred over. We don’t allow for more than 1 person in the accounting department to be on vacation or out of office at a time. The accounting assistant is constantly on vacations. She went to Europe for 2 weeks and worked remotely for 4 days, on a road trip and worked remotely a day and used PTO, she was on bereavement leave because her brother passed, went to Egypt for a week and worked remotely a couple days, now she wants to book a week off for a roadtrip with some remote time, and a week off next year for a vacation in Ireland. A staff accountant asked a week ago for the same week she is on her next road trip off to take her kids on vacation and has already booked the arrangements. I denied the request and told her that I would talk to the assistant about switching her road-trip. The assistant said that she booked the week off first and would like to go on her road trip that week. It feels to me like she is just doing that to make everyone frustrated and is quite childish. I told her that she would need to tell the accountant. This happened with the same accountant who tried to book time off to see her mother while the assistant had already booked the time off to go to Egypt. I practically had to beg her let the accountant have her time off.

Additionally, I’ve received complaint of this assistant talking about her vacations and trips and it makes the accountants feel like she is bragging. The assistant takes a lot of weekend trips and goes to concerts and when the accountants ask how her weekend was she’ll say “good, I went to this or this concert” or say “it was ok, I went to this place to hike “ it doesn’t feel like bragging to me but I told her to keep her weekend escapades to herself.

This morning I was talked to by my boss saying that the assistant wrote an email to her about everything that happened and I was written up for it. The email said that the assistant is happy to just come to work and work and not talk about her life but that she is confused because others ask her about her life and that she is following the handbook and just enjoying her benefits with asking for PTO and that she is feeling singled out because she doesn’t have kids and that makes her plans less valuable.

AITA here?