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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/More-Vehicle393 on 2023-09-19 22:07:16.

My ex bf and I were together for almost 2 years (our two year anniversary is in 2 weeks). My ex bf broke up with me because he’s grieving his mothers death with is 100% valid. He didn’t grieve all the way and the emotional toll and stress of that and worrying about me took a toll on him.

He broke up with me and said he doesn’t want to hold me back from anything. I love him and don’t want him to feel like I’m not going to be there for the worst moment of his life.

We might get back together one day because we’re both still so young and need to grow as people before we get back together.

That being said of he doesn’t want to hold me back, if I flirt with out people, go on dates with other people, makeout with other people, or download any dating app, we are permanently broken up and can never get back together.

Before he told me the dating apps clause, I downloaded tinder and starting talking to guys. I didn’t want any hookups, I just wanted to talk to people who haven’t seen me cry in the shower. I deleted the app because the conversations were honestly boring.

It feels like I’m still be controlled. It’s not a breakup if you are still dictating who a person talks to and what they do.

We’ve gone on a break before and I made out with a guy because we were on a break and I told him about it. He was the most pissed and hurt I’ve ever seen him. I’ve apologized and tried to make up for it as much as I can. This happened a year and a half ago. He’s worried this is going to happen all over again. He also says that he just doesn’t want to see me like that.

I’m going to honestly admit I’ve cheated on him in the past by flirting with other guys while we were dating, but we’ve talked about it and moved on. He says he forgives me.

I honestly don’t know what to think and how to move forward. I don’t want to be dating other people but I also want the freedom to talk to other guys at parties. I really need some input on this.