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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Automatic_Lab_7587 on 2023-09-15 12:02:04.
I, female (28) realised in 2019 that my mum had taken out multiple credit cards and retail finance in my name while I was at university as she had access to all my personal information and spent them all to their limit and ignored them. At this point my family home was being sold as my parents were separating so I thought let my mum get her share of the house sale money and she would pay it all off in one go due to the influx of cash she would have. Based on her words this was her intention.
That point came and went and the money just disappeared on luxuries such as a car, expensive rented apartment and holiday. She even bought my brother who is 2 years older than me a new car! My debt stayed under my name with letter after letter coming to me. I confronted her again in 2022 to which 2 were cleared still leaving me with just over 8k debt.
Over the past year there have been so many promises to pay it all off and none of which have actually happened. In June this year I informed her the recovery agency would be taking additional steps against me unless a payment plan was set up so I messaged her and she sent me proof of it being set up.
Fast forward to September and the company calls me daily so I went to check how much has been paid off only to find out the payment plan had been cancelled by her. I asked her and she was adamant she had been paying it for the last 3 months. She refused to show me any proof on her online banking for these transactions. I called the recovery company to confirm this and they told me the direct debit was cancelled the same day it was made. Bear in mind the payment plan was ONLY for £20 a month!
I obtained proof of this and went to re-confront her, only for her to continue lying to me and turn it around on me. After 4 years I am now tired that not only has she been treating my financial situation like a joke but wishes to lie to me on a daily basis to “keep me quiet” I see no intention of her ever paying back the £8000 debt under my name.
I am left unable to open credit cards, take out loans or even get approved on a mortgage due to this situation. I am so deeply hurt that a parent would intentionally do this to their child and let them suffer. I have no faith in the woman that birthed me that she actually wants to fix the mistakes she made.
So am I the asshole for wanting to open a fraud investigation against her in an attempt to be free of this burden I have not done to myself?