This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.
The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Kookies3 on 2023-09-15 06:57:36.
Hi all, I’m just after some advice or resources to help me deal with my husband, who I think might have a real, innate and mostly subconscious sense of entitlement to women’s bodies. An expectation of sex just because you’re married (or proposed, or earned a good pay check that month), or after x amount of days MAX have gone by, and if not good enough (goal post moves) - gives themselves permission to cheat or view porn and be mean/cold (obviously this is denied… but it’s happening).
You really end up feeling like you’re never enough, despite having an objectively normal amount of sex, and like there’s no flexibility about when life gets in the way for sexy time. Like it’s really his upmost priority and I’m a walking vagina, first and foremost.
I genuinely think he doesn’t know he has this pre conceived sense of entitlement and I’m wondering if it’s something that can be helped. Most of the resources I’m finding speak of cases of violent sexual assault
(I don’t want to get too far into it, but we have regular sex - every 3rd day at minimum. I also never used to care about porn at all but it bothers me now since his infidelity, and I made it very clear I’d like him to stop).
It’s a very hard topic to bring up without instant defensiveness and I just need a good strategy, because I want to save this marriage if it can be saved .
I know sexual coercion is a form of abuse - but it’s a hard one to explain to someone with an entitlement issue. And even harder when it’s subtle. I hope I’m making sense ….