This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.
The original was posted on /r/cfb by /u/lurkerspringa on 2025-07-09 21:53:03+00:00.
Notes:
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These results come from my post earlier this morning
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I have opted for a 3-4 defense as there were a ton of outstanding LB names
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LBs, DBs and QBs have the most outrageous names. Enjoy.
Head Coach: Dean Pees; Kent State (4 Upvotes)
1st Team Offense:
QB: General Booty; ULM (207 upvotes)
RB: Jimmy Johns; Alabama (17 Upvotes)
WR: Decoldest Crawford; Louisiana Tech (182 upvotes)
WR: Peerless Price; Tennessee (38 Upvotes)
WR: Buster Rhymes; Oklahoma (22 Upvotes)
TE: Jake Butt (152 Upvotes)
OL: D’Brickashaw Ferguson; UVA (294 Upvotes; received the most votes of any player)
OL: Parker Titsworth; Ohio (102 Upvotes)
OL: King Large; SMU (19 Upvotes)
OL: Kobe Buffalomeat; Illinois State (6 Upvotes)
OL: Tiger Shanks; UNLV (5 Upvotes)
1st Team Defense:
DL: Dee Liner; Alabama (31 Upvotes)
DL: Bronko Nagurski; Minnesota (13 Upvotes)
DL: Lion King; Eastern Michigan (5 Upvotes)
LB: Noah Knigga; Eastern Michigan (196 Upvotes)
LB: Memorable Factor; Duke (70 Upvotes)
LB: Happy Dicks; UGA (56 Upvotes)
LB: Lucious Pusey; Eastern Illinois (32 Upvotes)
CB: Storm Duck; UNC (128 Upvotes)
CB: Wonderful Teriffic Monds, Jr.; Nebraska (90 Upvotes)
S: Ha Ha Clinton-Dix; Alabama (185 Upvotes)
S: Wave Ryder; Navy (79 Upvotes)
1st Team Special Teams:
PK: Chris Blewitt; Pitt (80 Upvotes)
P: William Shakespeare; ND (57 Upvotes)
2nd Team Offense:
QB: Jim Bob Cooter; Tennessee (48 Upvotes)
This team has a deep QB room with benchwarmers BJ Dickey; Michigan (38 Upvotes), Monte Cristo; Nebraska (31 Upvotes) and Munchie Legaux; Cincy (23 Upvotes)
RB: Chris Fuamatu-Ma’afala; Utah (15 Upvotes)
shout out to backups Young Boozer; Bama and IM Hipp; Neb. (13 Upvotes each)
WR: Boobie Feaster; USC (12 Upvotes)
WR: Phat Watts; Tulane (7 Upvotes)
WR: Golden Tate; ND (5 Upvotes)
TE: Kyle Sackrider; Michigan State / Rowdy Beers; FIU (disrespectfully low 4 Upvotes each)
OL: Pork Chop Womack, Miss. State (2 Upvotes)
OL: Lloyd Cushenberry III; LSU (2 Upvotes)
OL: Guy Whimper, ECU (2 Upvotes)
OL: T-Bob Hebert; LSU (2 Upvotes)
OL: Gentle Williams; Cal (2 Upvotes)
2nd Team Defense:
DL: Legend Journey; Cal (4 Upvotes)
DL: Silverberry Mouhon; Cincy (4 Upvotes)
DL: Octavious Oxendine; Kentucky / Oghenerukevwe Orhorhoro; Clemson (3 Upvotes)
LB: Yourhighness Morgan; FAU (31 Upvotes)
LB: Steele Chambers; Ohio State (16 Upvotes)
LB: Michael Stonebreaker; ND (14 Upvotes)
LB: Barkevious Mingo; LSU (12 Upvotes)
shout out to backup Bumper Pool; Arkansas (7 Upvotes)
CB: Smoke Monday; Auburn (72 Upvotes)
CB: Moh Bility; Rice (40 Upvotes)
S: Corn Elder; Miami (50 Upvotes)
S: Dude Person; Central Arkansas (42 Upvotes)
shoutout to backups Kool-aid McKinstry; Bama (36 Upvotes), Pig Cage; UTSA (22 Upvotes) and Immaculate Perfection Harris; Georgia Tech (9 Upvotes)
Bonus PK: Swayze Waters; UAB (2 Upvotes)