This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.
The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/preggoweddingaita on 2023-09-11 20:49:30.
My husband (34M) and I (32F) have been married for 8 years and have 2 kids (6 & 4). I am currently 7-months pregnant with our 3rd child. This has been by far my worse pregnancy. Overall health-wise, me and baby are fine, no major issues. But the general fatigue and discomfort of being pregnant while also having 2 other kids to take care of is wearing on me. I’ve also had more nausea and terrible heartburn.
As a result of me being tired literally all the time, my husband has had to take on a lot of additional household and childcare duties. He’s been great about it and thinks are still running smoothly even though I can do about 1/3 of the household and kid stuff I usually do.
This past weekend we attended a wedding for one of my friends from college. My husband knows a lot of people in this friend group and he was really looking forward to some adult social interaction. The wedding was a 3 hour drive from our place so he got his parents to babysit and booked a hotel so we wouldn’t have to drive home and could enjoy the reception.
I felt fine all day up until halfway through the reception. But it was like I hit a wall energy-wise and started getting terrible heartburn. My husband was off mingling with people while I pretty much just sat at a table for over an hour talking with whoever came by to say hi. My husband came over to check on me and I told him that I wasn’t feeling well and wanted to leave.
He asked if I would be comfortable taking the shuttle back to the hotel by myself so that he could stick around and keep socializing. I told him I want him to come back to the room with me in case I start feeling worse so that he can take care of me. He didn’t protest or argue with me, but he did give a big sigh in the “Ugh, ok fine” kind of way. When we got back to the room, I was so exhausted that I fell asleep immediately.
He was short with me all morning as we were getting ready to leave. A lot of one-word answers kind of stuff. On the way home I asked him what his deal was and he said he’s frustrated that I “made” him go back to the room with me only for me to fall asleep. He said if he knew I was just going to fall asleep, he would have stayed at the reception for longer.
He said that this was the first social interaction he’s had in months and with the new baby coming, will probably be his last social interaction like that for months again. I told him that I didn’t “make” him come back with me, I just told him I wanted him to in case I felt worse. I also told him my health should be his priority over any social event anyway. He said that wasn’t really giving him a choice because if he stayed, even if I fell asleep right away like I did, I would still hold it against him that he “chose wrong.”
He said he was just enjoying behaving like an adult instead of a dad for one night and he’s allowed to be frustrated that was cut short. It might just be hormones, but his attitude is making me feel guilty about this.