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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/MNCPA on 2023-09-09 14:47:02.

My ex-wife was morbidly obese and refused to eat healthy or exercise. Her life goal was to do a Christian mission trip in Africa. We saved up for several years to get to be able to do this trip.

We live in the USA and needed to travel 20-24 hours between buses and planes. My ex-wife did all the planning and coordinated all the transportation.

There was one connecting flight that was 30-45 minute walk in the airport. Our plane arrived late, so we had less time to run through the airport to catch our connecting flight.

We had to run to make it. Because of my ex-wife’s health issues, I was carrying all of the bags. All my ex had to do was run to the gate.

About halfway, she just sits down in the middle of the walkway and tells me she can’t go anymore and starts crying. I try encouraging her to keep going…that we will miss the flight. I ask if she wants to be wheelchaired or grab a handicap golf cart to get her to the gate in time. Her pride wouldn’t let either of these options work.

I run ahead to the gate and tell the people that my ex-wife is coming. Since I can’t leave my bags unattended in an airport, I ran back with the bags to my ex-wife. By this time, she had the strength to standup and start walking.

By the time we make it to the gate, the plane is still waiting for us. My ex-wife was yelling at me all the way to the gate. She was yelling that I was abusive because I left her to tell the waiting plane about us. I didn’t say a thing other than ‘I’m sorry, the plane was waiting.’ On the plane, I was exhausted from running with all of our bags throughout the gates and my ex-wife was completely silent in the plane.

In retrospect, I have a sense of peace in my divorce life. If this situation ever happens again with a future partner, then I want to make sure that I am doing the correct things.

Am I an asshat for leaving my ex at the airport?

TLDR - Ex coordinated a mission trip, ex got tired trying to make a connecting flight, I ran ahead to tell the waiting plane about us, and my ex called me abusive. Am I an asshat?

Edit - I’m agnostic, so I don’t believe in Christian missionary stuff. I went as a supportive partner to help my ex fulfill one of her life goals. The people we met in Africa knew more about Christianity than my ex. Not sure if this helps explain the situation for the crowd judgment. ¯_(ツ)_/¯