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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Few-Basket5313 on 2023-09-07 18:56:20.
I 29F am a sahm of a three year old girl and a one year old boy. My husband 30M works a 9-5 job from monday to friday. As a result, the majority of the household responsibilities mostly fall on me.
Yesterday, after a particularly stressful evening with my kids, I was too tired to even move around. My one year old was refusing to calm down, and my three year old certainly wasn’t making things easy. I spent the whole day running after them and safe to say at the end of it, I was completely spent. I felt like crying tears of joy when I saw that my husband had come home, as I could finally have some time for myself and leave the kids with my husband.
I told my husband I planned to have 3-4 hours to myself, and to take care of the kids while I was in our room. My husband had initially agreed, but when I told him how long I intended to relax, he point blank refused me and made some excuse about having a ‘skull splitting’ headache, and how he couldn’t look after the kids today for that long but will make up for it tomorrow. He did have to work overtime yesterday, plus had some important stuff at work going on for the past few weeks, which had been a huge cause of stress for him. I knew all this, but I thought it was only fair for me to get some time for myself after the day I had had today, and him looking after his own kids for a few hours just so I could have some alone time shouldn’t be this big of deal. He could relax afterwards, after all (on the weekends, we each get one day free). He remained adamant however, and wouldn’t budge. I got frustrated and told him to get over himself, and that him not taking responsiblity for his own kids was neglect, after which he acquiesced, albeit still reluctantly, while I left to take a bath.
I thought this whole conversation was over as we were conversing normally afterwards, although he was a bit distant. I figured he would just forget about it later, I was wrong, however. Just after he left for work today, I got a call from my MIL who was literally screaming at me for not ‘caring about her son and his needs, and for being a ‘selfish’ brat.’ I was mortified of my husband having told her about our personal matters, especially when he didn’t talk to me about it first. I also felt like MIL was intruding in matters that were unrelated to her, so I told her to mind her own business. She ended the call afterwards, but I still wonder if I did anything wrong. So reddit, AITA?